Comments on imperfect prose: on why i'm giving gifts to my children this christ...

Hey Emily - I missed this before, and I'm sorr...

2012-01-26T13:28:00.936-08:00

Hey Emily - I missed this before, and I'm sorry I did. Because I appreciate it and agree with you 100%. Absolutely, 100 percent. Thank you for saying it.

And God bless the Fritz boys. That breaks my heart.

I love this. SO MUCH. I think God's beauty an...

2012-01-09T22:07:00.277-08:00

I love this. SO MUCH.

I think God's beauty and grace is AS MUCH in the rapture as in the sacrifice.

And Jesus was real to me ALL year long as a child...not JUST for Christmas....such a lovely balance here!

I have always thought there was more to a gift tha...

2011-12-30T07:25:08.503-08:00

I have always thought there was more to a gift than the gift - it tells a story, it speaks of connection, differences in different types of relationships. Those special gifts, when someone knows your heart and dreams and that gift whispers to the dream - oh, those are the most precious - even if it is a bag of cookies or a box to hide your treasures in or a hat to sport your attitude.

"If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!" (Matt 7:11).

How can they think themselves worthy of gifts from the Father, if they do not receive gifts from their earthly mothers and fathers. Our gifts dim in comparison to His - our children need to know they are valued enough to receive gifts:)

My heart breaks for that little boy who so wants his mother to hold him. Praying that he feels the love of God surround him, that he is like Samuel left at the church finding comfort in the presence of God:)

I have never read your blog before and I know God ...

2011-12-27T20:30:49.528-08:00

I have never read your blog before and I know God led me to this post for a reason. I have struggled this year in particular over whether it is OK to give my children anything. We did give to them, just a few things, and I am thankful for the peace I have now, especially after reading this. Truly, He loves to give us good things. And I do to my sweet ones as well. Thanks for sharing.

darn you, emily! always blurring out my computer ...

2011-12-23T17:34:23.132-08:00

darn you, emily! always blurring out my computer screen!

Man, I needed to read that. What a lovely breath o...

2011-12-22T20:28:26.118-08:00

Man, I needed to read that. What a lovely breath of fresh air. Thank you. {Goes back to wrapping gifts...}

We've decided to give gifts but a few like you...

2011-12-22T17:18:42.884-08:00

We've decided to give gifts but a few like you. It's a balance. Merry Christmas to you and your family :) Your kids are so adorable!

I am days late in reading your post, so busy with ...

2011-12-22T07:44:03.858-08:00

I am days late in reading your post, so busy with the holidays. Since I have had four little ones, though all but one is out of the nest, I wanted to share this.

Unless your child is sealed off from the rest of their neighborhood, they don't go to public school, they don't watch any TV or listen to the radio, they will of course hear all about presents, giving gifts, shopping, and of course Santa. To stand up as a parent and deny that child of gifts is well....crazy.

Better would be to teach a life lesson on giving is better than receiving. That it is important to understand what it means to be given a gift and see that giving is a treasure as well. But we are talking about kids that change every year. One year they can be greedy and the next they may be quite happy with that one toy they have longed for. One needn't flood a child with tons of presents, but a few that they will really enjoy.

Childhood should not be a projection of the the flavor of the month in parenting. Just because someone else planted the seed of not giving a child the pleasure and magic of a gift doesn't make it wise or right. As a parent, what we do will be remembered. Believe me you don't want that child to remember the year without a gift because mommy and daddy thought the kids shouldn't have any. That will be how they remember it. Not the message the parent thought he was giving.

Have a child pick a toy out to donate and have them bring it to a drop off location or to a shelter. That they might remember if it is done every year. Alright...I will close here. Have a Merry Christmas...the best gift I have in my home is the love of my children and husband...

I completely agree... oh, and you have to know how...

2011-12-21T16:15:52.356-08:00

I completely agree... oh, and you have to know how adorable your kids are! Just so cute.

Janelle

oh..so, so, so good. thank you for this.

2011-12-21T14:55:19.664-08:00

oh..so, so, so good. thank you for this.

Yes, mommas make Christmas. I will give my kids g...

2011-12-21T08:48:52.758-08:00

Yes, mommas make Christmas. I will give my kids gifts, but I will carefully consider the message I'm sending them, too. My kids will one day forget the toys and clothes, but they'll forever remember our family traditions, the priorities we establish, and the memories we make.

Oh, dear friend..how this made me cry. Because, I...

2011-12-21T08:19:37.767-08:00

Oh, dear friend..how this made me cry. Because, I have had to give up gifts this Christmas. My husband just came home and announced that he's lost his job. And the few things I had been able to purchase for my children are going back to the store so that someone else can give them to their children...and the excitement that I was pregnant with has miscarried. I sit before Father, and ask why? Why am I consistently denied the joy of giving? and I cry angry like a toddler who isn't getting her way...but He is in the small, still voice. and as I lie exhausted from my fit, with tear dampened hair I know that the Gift Giver is here, and maybe He wants us to concentrate on His gift to us without the distraction of our gifts to each other.

I truly rejoice for you that you are able to give. For it is better to give...

Thank you for this post. I have been so discourage...

2011-12-20T19:19:28.004-08:00

Thank you for this post. I have been so discouraged reading of the angst of some young Mom's trying to figure out what they should do for gift giving. My daughter is now 16 and I can truly say she gets just as much joy giving as receiving. Balance is key.

I'm so glad you had the courage to speak from ...

2011-12-20T18:06:14.524-08:00

I'm so glad you had the courage to speak from this perspective--and so eloquently too. I wholeheartedly agree. I love your words, "we're turning infants into martyrs ... we're over-spiritualizing christmas and missing the simple joy of tearing into paper and seeing the knowledge of being loved spread across a child's face." Just perfect!

You speak for my heart, too, Emily. Yes, so much v...

2011-12-20T15:25:34.321-08:00

You speak for my heart, too, Emily. Yes, so much value in giving to our own too. God blesses all the way around.

yes. Yes. YES. And amen :)

2011-12-20T13:53:10.673-08:00

yes.
Yes.
YES.

And amen :)

and those pictures of your boys --- precious.... ...

2011-12-20T13:16:54.317-08:00

and those pictures of your boys ---

precious....

they are gifts from God...

cause that's the kind of gifts HE gives.

For one so young, you are so wise... and my heart ...

2011-12-20T13:15:39.824-08:00

For one so young, you are so wise... and my heart aches for those who are without mamas [me, but I am old], but for the young -- it must be so hard....

note: Christmas is not the same when you don't have your parents to share it with --- that's why -- it's for children --- it has always been.

:)

For all of us here on God's earth, Christmas s...

2011-12-20T10:48:37.643-08:00

For all of us here on God's earth, Christmas should be a big deal. Children should have big Christmas memories. I am thankful for these blessed times. Making magic does not have to be expensive. Enjoy your life in Christ.
Happy Christmas to you all!

I just love how you always have a fresh and refres...

2011-12-20T10:10:37.862-08:00

I just love how you always have a fresh and refreshing perspective. Hearing from you is like a big gulp of cold water on a summer day. I hope you have a very very joyous Christmas! :)

I appreciate your words here. I struggled with th...

2011-12-20T06:43:37.950-08:00

I appreciate your words here. I struggled with this this year, feeling that my children already have so much and that if they were *better* children, they would realize that they do and would want to spend the entire allowance of money for gifts on those who have so little.

And then, I realize, they are kids. And they do have hearts to give and we have. And it is not in giving them a few gifts of Christmas that is wrong, but rather if we ignored those whom God has asked us to care for.

Just giving gifts of love. Merry Christmas E.

2011-12-20T06:27:02.727-08:00

Just giving gifts of love.

Merry Christmas E.

I started to write a very similar post tonight, bu...

2011-12-20T00:11:26.458-08:00

I started to write a very similar post tonight, but ended up somewhere completely different. So I am DEEPLY grateful for these words, friend, and for the good thinking behind them. The very first sermon I ever preached was on the John text about the woman who poured the expensive ointment over Jesus. And Jesus' strong, strong commendation of her for that offering. When we love on our children -within reason and budgets - we give them examples of extravagant love - the very thing Jesus noted in the woman's gift. I absolutely agree that consumerism is a disease to be guarded against, but giving NO gifts on Christmas? No, I can't quite go there. We have reached a middle ground in our family - we do both. We give each other gifts through World Vision, Water, Inc., our denominational missions program. AND we give small gifts of material love, things that say, "You are valued. I love you. Let me show you." Thank you for saying this so much better than I could. Just lovely.

Emily your boys are getting so big! LOVE love the ...

2011-12-19T17:39:43.470-08:00

Emily your boys are getting so big! LOVE love the photos ! gift giving too requires balance , grace and a tender heart for those children with the tired eyes...

blessings to you and yours my friend!

this is perfect and beautiful em. absolutely righ...

2011-12-19T14:26:54.163-08:00

this is perfect and beautiful em. absolutely right on. thank you for allowing me to breathe again instead of feeling condemnation. i love you dear friend.